Another Reason to Hate February!

Hello dear readers and friends, how are we doing today? Are you in the full swing of hating life all because of those dreaded winter blues? Well, let's talk about the mean reds, shall we? (Breakfast at Tiffany's  reference, anyone?!) I meeeean, what happens in February about, oh, half way through the month? A day where we're supposed to profess our love to whomever with cards and homemade mailboxes? Oh....we aren't 10 anymore? Well then, shit, this holiday sucks!

I am not the anti-Valentine's Day gal because I've never had one. In fact, I always have....which isn't bragging in the slightest if you've met half the guys I dated (SSB not included, relax). I just never understood the holiday because I show lah-ving 24/7, so long as the rest of the world isn't being a bag of douche and forcing me to turn into the bitch I usually am.

However, we (being me and the BF, duh) still celebrate the holiday, and SSB and I will be doing so by eating a ton of red meat and guzzling down plenty of red wine (I'll take one for the team here), so we're totes in the spirit to celebrate the mean reds during this oh-so festive holiday! WHAT TO WEAR then? Let's discuss........

I am rocking a fitted black dress from H&M that does way too good of a job of giving me a curvy top half and a whittled waist (but nowhere near as disgusting as that gal with the 20" waist.....gag). I plan on wearing a cream cropped jacket with black trim that gives a bit of a Chanel feel but at an H&M price. Fun Fact: For any "big" date SSB and I have had, I have worn an H&M dress. How about them apples?! Anywho, find a dress that is sexy but still classy, because you want your man (or your flavor of the moment) to see you as a force to be reckoned with......and you just look sleazy and cheesy (and too downright easy) in a dress too short or in a too-bold print. Stick to neutrals, solids, and polished shoes. You're dressing for your date, not the rest of the world, and it is best to keep it demure and subtle if you're going to a nicer place.

If there was ever a time to invest in a fabulous apron, now would be the time! Wear a classic v-neck or cardigan,  throw on some dark skinnies, great flats, and find the cutest damn apron out there! Buy him one, too, to make the night that much more fun. Cooking together is a great way to commemorate the holiday; buy the heart-shaped cookie cutters, make food that is red or pink (spaghetti?!) and go all out in the cheesiest way possible. Finish the night with cute satin PJs (Victoria's Secret has the best) and watch the cheesiest love movie you can find! (SSB would never let that last part slide....and confession: I loathe The Notebook. I know....but it's just too sad!)

Some girls try to play the "it's about you" card and do something fun for their man.....even if they'd rather let their pup eat their favorite pair of heels than go to a hockey game on Valentine's Day. Regardless, if you are one of these gals, best to dress cute so you can at least look good while being miserable. Check out my post HERE on some great sporting event outfits. As for the ice skating bullshit (kidding), it's a great idea so long as you don't mind freezing. Wear a great winter coat and a bright scarf that brings out, I don't know, the color of your eyes...or the rosiness of your frozen cheeks (on your face, dolls.....) It's February after all, and if you're located in the north or east this month, the most important part is to stay warm...but still look gaw-ghus doing it!

"Forget men, let's just put our pocketbooks on the floor and just dance, screw guys, I just wanna dance!" Dane Cook had it right when he made this joke years ago. Some gals prefer to just hit up the town all-BFF-style over the holiday weekend and rightfully so! Wear the hottest jeans you have with that great blouse/top....you knowwww, the one that makes the girls look good but not like you're suffocating them....just the perfect balance to create that comment from your BFF that is something like....."Woah, when did she become so hot? I'm jealous.....she's going to dance with so many more guys than me. Bitch....." Add a blazer or leather jacket to offset the fact your girls will be freezing and top (or bottom?!) it off with the tallest black heels or wedges you own. OR the red heels that everyone else thinks are questionable but somehow become totally appropriate for this specific night!
(Funny Side Story.....one of the classes at my school had Mock Trials. The girls were told to look professional, like something their mother or grandmother would wear. One girl came in wearing the most offensively tight, short black skirt with HOT PINK 5-inch heels. It's a shame when your shift at the local 18&under club runs into, oh, 7:30am! Yikes.....)


What are you planning for your holiday/holiday weekend? Fill me in, I'd love to hear it. I leave you with some last-minute tips on keeping your hair and makeup just as festive as the rest of you this holiday ;)


HAIR AND MAKEUP TIPS
**Bring out the red lips if you're out with the girls....stick with a soft stain if you'll be smooching the man.
**A great pink cheek against a nice winter face is always in style. Use a bit of creme blush under a powder to help it set and last all night!
**Try putting hot rollers in your hair while doing your makeup or choosing your outfit. Flowing hair with a bit of bend and curl is perfect for the occasion. Not too stuffy but still romantic and fun! Be sure to hairspray the hell out of it with flexible hairspray, too!

Alright, put cupid's arrow in my ass, I'm done talking about this holiday!


Until next time, farewell love bugs and blogger valentines.................................