Love's Hangover Remedy

Even though your Valentine's Day roses are already wilting and your heart-shaped candy box has been in the trash since, oh, 9:30am last Wednesday (I don't judge), the love is still in the air....and it's only proper for a blogger to grab that air, breathe it in.....and then write about it.

Or do her best to show said love in black & white photos of only the hottest pieces of ass in town!....or, uh, in LA town, not this town, as I'm usually surrounded by 16-18 year olds who think they are hot but are actually small, small babies with even smaller maturities.

I am not usually one to gush over celebrities, because I have class, dignity, and am in a loving relationship with SSB.
Unless you count John Mayer. I've lost all class when it comes to dishing about this piece of meat. Too bad he's a huge bag of douche now....still hot, though.


WHO else is hot in my eyes? (but not as hot as SSB, in the off chance he is reading this!!) WELL, I will show you....in black & white photos. Everyone looks better in black & white and men look sexier in black & white, so let's get down to biznizz! 
WARNING: With this post, I have claimed stake to all of the following gentlemen. If, at any time, they become available for you to date, please inform them that you will be unable to accept their loving gesture because I, SS bitch, have already called dibs.....so send them my way, if you would be so kind ;)

1. James Dean (claiming him for the after-life, clearly) -- WHAT a stud. The start of all studs. He made it possible for men like James Franco, Johnny Depp and Justin Bobby (of The Hills fame) to look dirty and somehow still have ridiculous sex appeal. Applause are neccessary for this fine ass.

2. Joseph Gordon-Levitt -- I meeeeean, does this need justification? No. It really doesn't. This man is near perfection, end of story. Sings, acts, dresses well, acts like a gentlemen, stars in romantic movies and blockbusters (like the upcoming Batman). So yes, he is our closest human being to perfection. Smell it, take him in, he's a breathe of perfect summer air (see what I did there?!)

3. Andrew Garfield -- Okay, I really do need to claim stake on this one, as he isn't huge yet but will be soon enough....once his Spiderman movie comes out. He has great taste in women, too, because his arm candy is none other than my girl crush, Emma Stone. Well played, hunky hunk, well played!

4. Paul Rudd -- Call me unconventional here, but he has some odd quirk that I really enjoy (that's what she said). His humor is dry, his hair is dark, and his smile is just that adorable smirk that makes you wonder if he's an asshole or if he just is laughing at the rest of us for being schmucks & suckers to his charm. Ado-able....I mean adorable!

 

Other notable men include: John Mayer (bears repeating!), Ryan Gosling (obvious), Robert Pattinson (vampire love), and the classic stylings of George Clooney (gold medal for silver fox status). Yummo in my tummo of man love!

Let it be known that I do not condone the behavior of treating people like meat. After all, Johnny Depp said it best in Charlie & The Chocolate Factory. "....even I am eat-able, but that is considered cannibalism and is frowned upon in most countries." BOOM!
Really, though, I mean this all in good fun. SSB is an asshole, but in the most loving way possible.
& sure, these men are fantastic, but I obviously do not want to come across like a woman who charges after men like a starved panther. That's just wrong.....and I'm much more like a calm barracuda, just ask SSB!
For more man candy, though, follow my boards on Pinterest -- woot, woot!

Until next time, share your man candy with me so we can all drool.....................

You Look Smash*ing, Dear!

It may be the teacher in me, but I suuuure do love me some organization!
I also drool over the Erin Condren planners just as much as the next girl....

BUT I am not about to spend $50 on a planner that isn't exactly what I want.
That makes me sound like a bitch....but what I mean is, don't you also love when your planner is unique to you?
Then perk up and listen about my new purchase that is smash-ing if I do say so myself ;)


SMASH Journals (not a journal at all, though, sorry Judy Blume types)

I was out at different craft stores with my sister and momma bear to look at wedding supplies (for my sister, not me, silly ones) when I saw this section of "scrapbooking" items that ended up being filled with all of these goodies:

{all of the items before tearing them open and crafting --

how freaking adorable, am I right?!}

They have over four different types of "journals" to choose from. I myself got the "pretty style" but others include "eco" or "retro" which are other great options. The pages are filled with random drawings, cardstock in different print, and different "titles" -- it's more or less an organizer for your life rather than a day-to-day planner with calendars. I posted some photos of the pages below:

{the bottom right photo is one of the pockets I bought --

comes in a set of four & you can glue them in with the

attached glue stick! & of course I added the cute polka-dot tape!}

The great thing about this company is that a ton of accessories come with it (well not with the book, but for the book you can buy separately)....and if you don't already know, I have a slight problem when it comes to accessories. You can buy tabs, post-its, pockets, and other items to make this "planner" your own....and all of them are so damn cute. I chose some solid tabs, others with designs, and two straps that keep the book compact when in your bag.....this is how mine looks when closed:

{I chose to use the black&white closing strap -- 

OH and those are my keys for my classroom....also cute.}

SO how is this book unique? Well, I wrote on a bunch of different tabs, glued them in with the pen/glue stick that comes with your chosen style of journal and made it entirely my own. I even took a piece of paper from the "pad" I bought for it and made a nice little label on the inside:

{very circus-like, love the old-timey feel!}

I chose to create tabs for things I always tell myself I will write down.....but never do. What is that you may ask? Well, an exercise page, a section for books I want to read, an "important" things to do page, and even a goals page that I have been meaning to start fo'eva now! Some of those pages look like this:

{tabs include sayings like "exercize is power" and "2 read is 2 learn" --

love how you can write whatever you want for the tabs!}

So, like I said, this is the planner/journal/organizer for the gal who already has a day-to-day calendar -- OH, and I should note that I found all of this at Michael's Craft Store after seeing it at Jo-Anne Fabrics first and it was cheaper AND 20% off......meaning ALL of the goods you saw in the first photo were $24 total. YES. I kid you not, of course, because that would just be mean.
The 20% deal runs until the 20th of February at my local Michael's, so you should run (not walk) to the closest one to you and grab these goods! I plan on going this weekend again to get even more tabs and fun items for my book.
If you decide to do the same, please post photos and let me know! I was beyond excited to bring all of my items home to make my customized book and I hope you have just as much fun with yours :)


It should go without saying, but this is not a sponsored post. I was just that excited about this new find! If you're more of an online type, check out this site to search for your own goods ;) ALSO check out their blog for some ridiculously awesome inspiration on how others have made their SMASH books entirely unique to them! (It is truly amazing....)


Until next time, I'm going to go and write down goals or draw some awesome doodles, have yourself a fantastic weekend................

The First Step To {Superficial} Recovery

.....let's just be clear, I do not have a problem. SSB will be the first to say I do, but it's really a hobby, a passion, a mere interest. It doesn't threaten my well-being....just my wallet.

If something can have an accessory, I feel it is my civil duty as a genuinely superficial person to give it that added extra touch of love.

No, I don't own a bedazzler.
Rhinestones make me vomit.

However, my iPhone is less than a year old & has been through five phone cases.
I just bought a Nook and had to buy it a cover and an adorable reading light...you know, in case I read in the dark (which SSB quickly pointed out....I'm never in the dark.) The light was necessary, though, just in case I find myself in the dark.....JUST in case, people!
I bought my keys small gems (posted in a photo here) just because having one key just didn't justify the cuteness of my new car. Yeah, I went there. That key couldn't be lonely, that's just rude!

So yes, it isn't a problem, so there's no need to recover from it. Here are some other things in the accessory depart that I am lahhh-ving right now...for accessorizing myself & the things around me that--you know--need love, too!

1. This is the cover I picked for my new Nook (and I'm currently reading Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children) -- love anything that looks like a notebook. It was this or a Kate Spade cover...but it was $60 and I just wasn't swinging that when the one I chose was half of that!

2. WHEN (not if) I get the next iPad (SSB's ears are burning somewhere), I will buy this case. I want a case that is more like a Nook cover. I like the sleeves and all that MBMJ & Michael Kors make, but I would much rather have a constant case covering the back, just like I like my iPhone. The patent blue is fierce in my opinion!

3. This watch. Love a dual-tone watch & also love rose gold. I also love that it is NOT a tortoise Michael Kors watch that is literally on everyone's wrists these days! I really must have this. (There goes that so-called "problem" talking again.....)

4. I love having little things here & there in my classroom and on my desk and I love what B&N has to offer in the way of office accessories. How cute are these bookends?! One can never have too many bookends simply because one can never have too many books! (Nerd alert.)

What do YOU love to accessorize? Please fill me in! Obviously I will not buy all of these as reality usually sinks in (or just SSB's voice) and tells me I do not need bookends in multiple amounts or an iPad case when the newest iPad hasn't even been (officially) announced yet..........
..........Fiiiiiiine. Maybe I do have a problem. The first step is admitting it. The second? Feeding it, keeping it ALIIIIVE (cue Frankenstein voice). Screw youuuuu, SSB, leave me and my well-accesorized life alone! (Just kidding, just kidding!!)


Until next time, I'm off to go and look for a new phone case (kidding...sort of)............

Howww Pinnnteresting, Dahhhhling....

I never jumped on the "Pinteresting Wednesday" bandwagon (however fashionably conscious that bandwagon may be!)....want proof? I'm not even linking this up...I'm just posting my recent pins. Does that make me a bitch? I rah-leeeely hope not. You're more than welcome to consider me lazy from it, though, that's entirely understandable and justified! (Sorry I'm not sorry?!)

As of late, here's what I've been pining (or pinning) after.....HAH so witty, how can you stand it?!

{I bought a set of 8 prints that are all Andy Warhol, in eight different colors, with eight different quotes..this is an example of one of them. My classroom could always use more color & I love having quotes for the kiddos to read and ponder. Yeah, I'm that teacher. Plus, Warhol is a native to my hometown, gotta represent!}

{Reese. I mean, can you get any prettier? I just wrote about her in my Globes post, but this photo bears a repeat of how awesome Miss Witherspoon truly is. Love the sweater/scarf combo, her makeup, her hair, gahhh, she makes me jealous! Why did I ever stray from my blonde strands?! Thank gawwwd they are slowly coming back!}

{This outfit really grabbed my attention and I can't even put my finger on as to why. She looks like a million bucks but also looks like she took little to no time to prepare the ensemble...that skirt even looks like a crappy fabric in the second photo, but a geeenius crappy fabric! I just love the chic-meets-edgy feel to it; I try to emulate that in my own style....if only I had oodles of money to make it easier! }

{I need this scarf in my life. Why have the original McQueen creation when you can go ahead and make a louder statement with a (in my opinion) much cooler skull print where they look like straight punks?! Who wants to give me $555 for it?! Any takers?!......Damnit.}

{I've been looking for a bangle I can add to my everyday arm party.....this one says it all. It's so perfect. I need to get to the closest Urban Outfitters and fast. Actually, I think it's only sold online. Cha-ching goes the register, boo-hoo goes my wallet.}



{Leather leggings/pants with a demin/chambray shirt? YES to all of the above, please! So badass but still so stylish and chic. I can't even take how much I love this look. Thanks to my friend for finding this photo first. Uhhhh, you know who you are biaaa!}

I have pinned much more but those are some of the ones I chose to share with all of you lah-vely readers ;) Share some of your pins....or better, leave your pinterest name in the comments so I can stalk what you're pining (errr, pinning!) after these days. HAH again, so witty. Sorry, I'm done now.....

Follow me here on Pinterest!

Until next time, happy pinning and happy Wednesday-humptastic-day!............

SS Insights & Insults, Volume Dos

Hello dear friends and readers, happy weekend to you and yours! Salutations all around.

Thought I'd take this time to shed light on the most recent pop culture news considering I am good for nothing else in life.

You know, because I read the Spark Notes of the novel I'm currently teaching my seniors (reeelax, I've read it before, liiiike, most of it...).
You know, because I write the drafts of blog posts when I should be on hall duty (to check passes? pssh).
You know, because I had my speech students write Current Events speeches so that I myself didn't have to read the actual news (& because another informative speech would be death to my soul).

1. God Did Spend (A lot) More Time on Her....while she was on 7th Heaven..... 
(99% sure she isn't wearing makeup in this photo...what a pretty bitch.)

Jessica Timberlake? Meh, sounds like a character from Sweet Valley High.  If you ask me, Biel is gaww-ghus, but in that all-American, no-need-for-makeup, rough but still classy kind of way. Not in the Justin Timberlake way. YEAH. You all know what I mean. He could date a Victoria's Secret angel, an exotic beauty from another country, or just about any drop-dead diva with a brain....but he had to go and pick a freaking Camden -- I feel as though her precher dad wouldn't approve, too much attention, too much focus away from the big man upstairs.
Really, though, I was not a die-hard JT fan (add another T and we have a serious crush!), but this news still made my heart die a bit inside. He was supposed to be a perpetual bachlor, playing in rom-coms, giving us all hope that more JT's exist in the real world. FAIL.

2. Merrymore

("Smile, laugh, act like this will last forever!")

This came out of left field, and while I am entirely indifferent when it comes to Drew Berrymore, I still thought this was great news....until my next thought was if it will actually happen. I just feel like, with these celeb days and ages, their double-sided tape has a better chance of sticking with them their their spouses do. Let's be real.....when you've been an actor since the age of 4 and a drug addict since the age of 13, I wish you luck, but your sober days may outlast your married days, just saying. The one thing she has going for her is that she'll probably never be nominated for Best Actress at the Oscars, giving her the dreaded "strong female" curse, dooming her marriage not even before the dust has settled around her award. Good job, Berrymore, way to aim low! (However, her man is pah-retty cute!)

3. "Living a Deeee-vorce Dream!"

(Just by judging this photo, they clearly are not marriage material.)

We allllll saw this coming, maybe not as much as KK and Kris, but it was only a matter of time until these two just were not longer a Mr. and Mrs. -- let's do the math, shall we? One adorable but spunky-spitfire pop singer plus one recovering addict to both sex and drugs equals nothing good! Over from the beginning? Yes. Were we all hoping they could make it, proving our world is perhaps something decent rather than doomed? Sure. Looks like this failed, giving us even less hope that we'll make it past December 2012. Thanks Myan calander, I blame you!

4. Move over Princess Rih-Rih, there's a new bitch in town!

(This belly is better than all of you, her blood is made of pure gold pretty much.)

It happened, it is here, and I probably am just as excited as I will be when I start having nieces and nephews. Beyonce's baby has arriiiiiived! Her and Jay-Z named their new baby girl Blue Ivy and I......accept it. Do I love it? No. Do I like it? Well, I don't hate it. It could be better, but more so, it could have been much worse. A reason for the name should surface before we even hit hump day this week, so if there's an adorable reason, well then, I'll probably give the name a bit more credit. That baby already has credit of the street variety, though, and other bitches in the R&B world better back up.....because this baby hasn't even left the hospital yet and she's already way cooler than you!

SS Beauty/Fashion Buzz

--Running out of bronzer in January is a travesty. Good thing Sephora gift cards are there to save the day. I am officially underwhelmed by the ever-so-amazing NARS Laguna (wayyy too much shimmer!) and the small Benefit Hoola box scares me, sooooo I went with the tried (once) and true Tarte Mineral Bronzer in Park Ave. Princess. I had Hoola in my hand, but when I compared the colors, Park Ave. just fit my skin tone better. To my dearest blogging bud, The Procrastinator, they do not sell The Balm at my Sephora (or my TJ Maxx's, for that matter), so I was bummed!!

--I am on the road to blonde a solid three months earlier than planned! It feels good to be back, but I'm not all the way back just yet. Didn't want to ruin the health of my hair so we're taking it slow. The progress you ask? A sunny brunette or a very dirtayy blonde. You decide. (It keeps looking a bit lighter in all the photos that I take -- and again, couldn't take a real photo as I still cannot find my camera cord. Blast!)

--I apparently went on a mini shoe binge and scored these two new beauts. Love is an understatement. Left pair is from Target and the right is a Steve Madden pair from Marshall's. Last one & in my size....necessary. I totally plan on rocking both to work, too, sooooo to the older bitches in their Easy-Strides who always glare at my footwear, look out, momma got new girls in town!

Hope you all had an enjoyable weekend -- my hometown had a nice random warm spell. Lah-ving that! I somehow managed to make it out both nights......but was tired during both outings, as well. I am not old, but boy, if I don't get a nap or hit the bed before 11pm, I'm just no good to the world. Note to self: NAP before going out for beverages if you do not plan on coming home until 4am. Woof, what is this, college?! Pshhh.

Until next time, farewell to you all suckassssss.......just kidding, that was rude.

To Trend or NOT To Trend.....

There are some things that, as of late, have been ailing me, or perhaps, not letting me live my life to its fullest height of superficiality (I kid, I kid). Let's discuss these matters in what I'd like to call: "Blogging is my therapy."

Don't panic, it's not getting that deep!

1. You "mustache" from this trend -- (that should read more like must dash, dear oblivious folks) I don't know why but the mustache craze confuses me so very much, and I've seen it everywhere in the blogosphere since summer! I would appreciate it if we would, at the very least, kill most of the hairy craze....it can remain on cute mugs from Urban Outfitters and the like, but having your entire wedding party holding up the mustache stick or constantly photographing yourself wearing the finger drawn hair craze and then tagging all of those photos on your facebook is just going beyond the normal boundaries! Please, for the love of all that is blogging, stop the madness!

{if you own all of this, you've gone too far!}

2. I hate blood, but love Edward -- I have an obsession and don't care who knows it! Actually, I do because I've never been overtly open about my love for all things Twilight and the vampire trend, but alas, I am opening up now since this is a therapeutic session where you, dear reader, are not allowed to judge. Do the books suck from a literary standpoint? Yes, the errors are horrendous, her editor should be fired, but I still love those books!! Did the first movie make me feel awkward from all the tension and fakeness from the actors? Without a doubt, stop biting your lip Kristen Stewart! The movies (and actors) have come into their own, though, and I think they've gotten better with time.

.....ok, ok, so I just want to see Edward Cullen break the headboard in the sex scene heard 'round the world. Don't judge me with those judgy eyes!

{if you haven't seen the trailer of him breaking the bed, watch now}

3. "You're one and only source into...." -- Ever since Gossip Girl has been added to Netflix (or ever since I discovered this fact thanks to AlmostBritain!), I have been watching it with every free moment given to me since the weekend. I may or may not have started the middle of season two on Saturday only to be six episodes away from finishing season four.......and I may or may not have watched it too much, as my own dreams the other night were narrated by Kristen Bell's voice, I kid you not (not nearly as glamorous as it may sound!) SSB told me I should take sleeping meds. I think maybe a good day away from GG would aid me just fine, but we all know that won't happen. XOXO.....

{not a Little J fan in the slightest!!}

4. It's beginning to look a lot like...nothing?! -- I love Christmas tunes as much as the....next gal or guy who loves Christmas tunes, but let's be real, the first snow fell over Halloween weekend and hasn't showed its glittery face since! I mean, I don't need the snow, really (no really, Mother Nature, I don't!!!), but I need something to feel like the holidays in order for my inner Santa-believing-child to come out and rejoice all things merry and bright. I listened to Michael Buble's Christmas album the other day before feeling like I just jumped the gun. Stepping into the Starbucks store today, though, totally changed everything. Father Christmas, you are now officially welcomed into my world :) You have been greeted with my snow globe fingers and the best Christmas album to date...NSYNC's. Yeah, I said it.

{OPI Skull & Glossbones under F21's Silver Sparkle Polish}

There you have it, "trends" I have been conflicted with in the past week or so.
Mustaches -- NO!
Vampires -- Just Edward Cullen.
Gossip Girl -- Intervention?!
Christmas -- Now HERE!


Until next time, I hope you also use blogging as your therapeutic session....after arriving home from your actual shrink...........

The Thoughts of a Penn State Student...

Sometimes when I read the news, I often wonder about the people directly involved, the thoughts of those who are connected, in any way, to the story, because, more often than not, the story is told from those who are merely hearing it second-hand or are asked to give their opinion on the matter, as if one person's opinion is the solid, factual truth. Tisk, tisk ESPN, shame on you.

Let's be serious, I don't really read the news that often, as it bores me almost as much as it saddens me. The times I do take the time to read and/or watch, however, my mind goes to those who are involved, and I sometimes wish they would speak out in place of those who are being paid to do so.

I'm here to do just that today, and you are free to ignore this post as it is not superficial, has nothing to do with a beautiful sanctuary, and is serious in nature. I mean, serious starts with an "S" which is the letter that dictates the title of this blog, but I digress......

I am, forever and a day, dedicated to my university. If you are new (or not), I graduated from the Pennsylvania State University in Secondary Education. "Wait, SS, you're, like, smart and teacherly?" Who would have thought!

If you have listened or read the news lately, you know my school has been under serious fire lately, we've been brewing in a steaming pot of turmoil and scandal......and for good reason. While I will not discuss the matters on my blog and while I will not go into details, you are welcome to google my school and the searches will--no doubt--lead you to news article after news article that has been haunting my school as of late.

I know many of you who read my blog do not call PSU your college home, but I do. Yes, do & not did. While I have graduated, I will forever be a Penn State student, something only a Penn State student can understand. We are family, past and present, and any one person can understand that a family is not chosen or hand-picked but rather formed through the years into one, solid unit. All families have hard times, some more than others, and we all have that awkward aunt who smells funny or the cousin who is convinced she's a vampire after one too many read-throughs of Twilight, but family is just that.....family.

I am sick and saddened and destroyed emotionally by the news, yes, but I am still not hurting as much as the victims and their families. However, if nothing rings more true, it is the fact that my university as a whole should not and cannot be discredited by the actions of a twisted and sadistic man and his hellish helpers. My school is not "wallowing in our filth forever" nor are we "forever ruined as a university for our actions." I'm sorry, "our" actions? As far as I am aware, I did nothing and knew nothing in this situation. I went to a school for a solid education, made friends, created a family, and enjoyed myself and my time at a school who has nearly been unscathed by the media for years....no, for generations. How dare you take that from me, from all of us who worked so hard to grow into good, upstanding citizens who could represent our school proudly. How dare you tell me I am wallowing in filth when I have nothing but a clean record, a pure heart, and a the strongest of pride for my university. Do not take down my university, my home when you know the actions only came from a troubling and disgusting man.

For those of you who know Joe Pa, you know him from the what the sports networks show you. We at PSU know him differently. We know he is the man who paid for our school to build a fantastic library on top of donating thousands of dollars more into our academic buildings to make our campus--our home--the best it can be. We know him as the man who lived just down the street from our university in a house as modest as himself. He is not "driven by power," not "bathing in the light of his fame." He is 61 years of dedication, passion, and love for the school I also love. He is not who they say he is....he is the father of this family, and every father makes mistakes, but this man did not react to his fortune or fame, he did not save a man just to save his football legacy. He did what he thought he had to do, and even if that is not enough, you cannot say that you have always done everything to the utmost....we are not perfect, we never claimed to be, despite what the media says about our school. We have pride but we are not conceited, we have strength but we are not too confident. We are not asking you to feel sorry for us, but rather, place your focus where it needs to be. This is not about football, this was never about football, and while I am upset that this man could not see through to his last game, I understand what had to be done. We are allowed to be upset by this, but by no means does that give anyone the right to judge us for our thoughts and emotions. For the record, as an aside, I am glad that our president was fired. His too-soon comment was without the appropriate, prior thought; it was severely careless, as he should not have spoken a word of his opinion when the issue was still so new, the wound was just inflicted, and he threw in salt. I never knew enough about this man to hate him, but I knew that he was just as careless with money, throwing dollar signs just about anywhere he walked, and now our university is paying dearly for it.....thank you for my enormous amount of loans, dear president. I am not sorry you were taken down in the scandal.

Do I think the man behind this scandal deserves life in prison? I think he deserves death for what he has done to the victims that have come out and for those of them waiting in the wings for justice and rightful punishment to fall on him. Do I think the men who lied in front of a court and in front of a judge deserve time in prison? Surely karma will do them in, and yes, they should be behind bars. Do I think the situation would have been different had the victims been young girls? Undoubtedly so, something that I have thought about many times. Do I think the situation would have been different had our university not had Joe Pa? Again, an easy answer, seeing as how the media has been waiting with bated breath for years to take him down with a story that would rock our university to its core. Would I have rioted in the streets had I still been a student there? Obviously, but more so "watching" rather than "rioting" which, I believe, is what 90% of those "rioters" were doing. The remaining 8% were there to create chaos and havoc and the other 2% probably just wanted to be on TV....hey, like I said, we are only human.

Despite the media claims, regardless of the man behind these acts, and ignoring those who are just spewing out hate and judgement for attention, I am here to say we are still strong, still true, still PSU, and while this story will not last forever, my pride in my university will.
"May no act of ours bring shame, to one heart that loves thy name, may our lives but swell thy fame, dear old State, dear old State."

HAPPY 100, BITCHES!

Shit is about to get real.

Is it amazing to anyone else that this is the 100th post -- on 11/11/11?!
No? You don't think so?
No one?
Bueller, Bueller?
SERIOUSLY?!
Fine......

Either way, regardless of your lackluster knowledge and/or opinion on my 100th post, it is STILL my "50x2" post....and I am loving that!
I wanted to do something interesting and a bit off-the-cuff than my normal spiel, but really, this is nothing earth-shattering or fantastical....it's just a memeto to mark the fact that I made it to 100 on 11/11/11 and on a Friday....it's like three great things all wrapped into one, like a perfect blogging burrito!
(If you want a real fantastical 100th post, read my pal's, The Procrastinator. Did you read/watch it? Pretty damn cool right?!)

So what is it SS, what's the deal? What are you going to share with us?!

I am going to share ME!
Don't we already know you?
I mean, pretty much.
But not reeeeally!
Here it goes.

Superficial Sanctuary = Torrie Smith
Yep. That's me, that's my actual name.

Why Torrie? Because my twin brother, Tyler, came out first....and my parents wanted our names to have the same first intials.
Yeah.....that's the reason.
Try sharing that story in a room full of students during your freshman seminar in college with people named "Paris" for where their parents met and "Tiffany" because it was where her mother worked when she met her dad.......I mean, I went to a fashion school for one hot semester after all! I had no good reason for being Torrie, sorry fashion whores.

However, I still think my name speaks a lot about who I am as a person.....if you think about it. Which I won't make you do, of course, because I'm just going to tell you WHY it speaks a lot about me....and you'll look at me with this new found respect because SS is about to get deep!

Torrie is not that common of a name....or it wasn't when I was in high school.
It is not short for Victoria (which is the number 1 question I hate next to "Can you feel your twin brother's pain?!" -- seriously, you're an idiot).
It is not spelled in the common way (both my sisters have "ie" endings in their names, too!)
It is not anywhere close to the mundane and humdrum last name of Smith.

.....which makes my name just like me....completely unique but still pretty boring.

I love being who I am, as different as that may be, as odd as I may be in my real life.
However, I am still proud to be a bit boring, whether that means I choose not to step outside my comfort zone or feel pressured into being a certain way or fitting into a certain mold.
I don't do drugs (except for caffeine), I don't have mental issues (that have been diagnosed anyways....or fixed with alcohol!), and I don't think my actions will land me a reality show on a channel that should be playing music.
But damnit, I am so stoked to be the person I am today, 23 (and a half!) years in the making! I love big, I laugh bigger, and I cry like a f*cking baby....but I would never trade being Torrie Smith for anything in the world.

Do you ever think about why you are the person you are? In all honesty, I think about that question a lot, because I am a firm believer in the idea that "everything happens for a reason" -- when I was younger this thought was more like, "Why wasn't I a dog?" or "What if God chose me to be this fork?!" to "What if I were just this chair, and my sole purpose was to comfort your ass?" to a more mature question of, "Why am I me? Why am I so unlike that person and what is the reason for me being me and not, well, anyone else?"

I don't ask it because I wish to be that person....and I certainly am ecstatic that I am not that chair.
I just think it's something fantastic to think about. Was was I made this way and not that way?
I have yet to find that answer and I don't really ever look for the answer, but I still love asking myself that question....just because.

So yes, I am still SS, but you can call me Torrie, too. My students sometimes call me T.Smith and I'm just fine with that name, as well. Some went as far as to call me T-Money, but I don't prefer that one so much...it ruins my chances of using it later when my rapping career takes off.

I still will write this blog in the same witty and sarcastic manner.
I still want to make you laugh and ignite your brain with the desires of all things makeup and skincare.
I still want to rant about my teaching days and complain about bad fashion choices.
I still will be me, but now you know the real name behind the other name of the girl behind this blog.

Leaving you now with a photo of the tattoo(s) I just got done this week that fits this post quite well. I added to my original tattoo to help balance out the other arm where I just got a feather.
It represents the feeling I have with my (real) writing and my flight and journey as a growing 20-something. BIG thanks to my future brother-in-law for doing it for me.....I love it!

"More than anything else, the sensation of flight is one of perfect peace mingled with an
excitement that strains every nerve to the utmost, if you can conceive of such a combination."

Mushy post over. AAAAAND SCENE!

Until next time, farewell blogger buddies, you mah bitches fo' life, and cheers to the next 100 posts.......

School Daze

I was trying to find a file on my computer last night and within the endless abyss of documents, prose, and pictures, I stumbled upon my college past. Sounds scary, but really, it was wild to see how much has changed--or hasn't!--since those days.

I haven't been out for very long, I know, but I have been removed from my days in fashion school (for one hot semester) and the days of my Rihanna bob, so I thought it'd be interesting to share SS through the years....college edition. I think it's hard for us to see ourselves any differently throughout the years because we see ourselves numerous times a day (what vain bitches we all are!).....but these photos show a bit of a glimpse of change through the years of 18-23....

FRESHMAN YEAR --

1. NO idea why this photo was taken, but I know I didn't take it. I think it was for my roommate's basic photo class or something. Either way, look at how blonde my hair was! I was in the sun a lot that summer so it was pretty light.....and long. I miss that length, I want it back!

2. I found that Power Ranger shirt at a thrift store right off campus called "Einstein's Attic" -- I look like I'm five...and that really hasn't changed much.

SOPHOMORE YEAR --

1&2. Still long hair, rocking the leather, my badass period where I chose the wrong boys (like the one behind me), the wrong booze, and made all the right memories. Junior year was a more severe version of this, but we won't divulge into those moments.........for another time, my loves. Cue Rihanna's most recent hit, "We Found Love" & these photos will make much more sense, HAH!

JUNIOR YEAR --

1. Where oh where did my hair go?! I loved this haircut at the time, so simple, so chic, definitely fit my personality. This was me, cah-learly intoxicated....celebrating my 21st!

2. I'll take random solo photos over the duck face pose photos anyyyyday, sister!

SENIOR YEAR --

1. Student teacher days, where of course I took photos of my self in school!

2. SSB is in the picture now.....literally. (I don't know why we look so sexy, I assure you we weren't trying to look salaciously at the camera....because SSB doesn't even know what that word means.)

AAAAAND NOW --

There you have it, the transformation of SS from scared freshman to graduated senior to now in the present day. I miss those days to a ridiculous extent. If you're still in college, I am a huge jelly belly because I wish I was in your position. Make the most of it, make all the wrong decisions just so you know you can make the right ones later!
If you're out of college like me, share your college photos! I would make this a cute link-up, but let's be honest, I'm way too lazy for that. Sorry I'm not sorry about it.


Until next time, farewell to you who never gained the freshman fifteen and to those who have not yet had the chance to do so........

SS Insight....& Insults....

As an avid celebrity whore who knows about the happenings of celebrities before most of the people in my circle ("Hello, I heard about that a solid three hours ago!"), I often times have had enough time to dwell on such celeb happenings and form an opinion about them before others even have the chance to peruse TMZ for the story.

It's a gift.

Not a gift that will save the world or rid people of disease, but in the very least give me a solid chance at winning a Trivial Pursuit game that is solely based on celebrities and/or facts that will never justify my college degree.

My thoughts this week? Well, in a nutshell:

--I think the person who is hurting the most in the Ksquared wedding is none other than Jessica Simpson.

--LaLohan in jail? Wait, I feel as though this has happened before..........and we got the mugshots to prove it!

--Indie lovers are crying over a wedding that has nothing to do with fat asses or Frankenstein look-a-likes.

--People.com thinks you're still obsessed with Will & Kate...which is great....because I totes am.

{I'm sorry....their offspring would never measure up to the cuteness that is Mason Dash....}

1. FAIRYTALE DIVORCE

I mean, let's be real, that wedding was never going to make it. I actually had full faith in Khole's wedding back when she decided to marry after a solid 5 minutes....and to this day I don't even know why I did, but hey, they are the ones still married!
What really hurt K&K is the fact that there was virtually no love shown on their two-day reality extravaganza.....unless you count Mason, because I love that little man...can we clone him?!  They fought over dogs, food, living situations...nothing was spared! She didn't even want to cry in front of him?! SSB has seen me cry multiple times (all his fault of course.....) -- these two were doomed. I'd like to say to K.Kardash, "If you're having hubby problems, I feel bad for you, son. I got 99 problems but Kris ain't one."
Really, though, Jessica Simpson got f*cked in this situation. The whole month of "IS SHE OR ISN'T SHE?!" (when she cah-learrrly was!) got trumped by this divorce everyone saw coming. Her whole cutesy Halloween costume as a "mummy" was a mere blimp in the celeb radar that day because of Kardashian and her extremely odd choice in a husband. So yes, J.Simp is in fact pregnant, but you may or may not know that because you were too busy reading how "hurt" the family is over this divorce.....the same family who loathed this Frankenstein freak for two days on national television.

{You left the house feeling pretty LaLohan? Really? Really?!}

2. DEJA VU JAIL TIME

Seriously, lock her up and melt the key so no one can duplicate it. LEAVE HER IN THERE. F*ck good behavior, overcrowding, or any other crap they may throw her way to get her out sooner.....keep her ass under lock and no key!
I get it, she didn't really do anything, it's not like she murdered her parents (though she should consider this) or was busted for drugs (though it's clear she is never sober), but she is just cray-cray enough to keep out of the public eye.....forever. Also, her choice of contour and blush during her last court hearing is plenty reason to keep her away from the limelight....I'm still gagging over her poorly made face. GAGGING.
Is there anyway someone can just accidentally shove her into one of those areas in the morgue so we can call it a day? I feel like half of the workers at that morgue (where she is doing her community service, hysterical) have been dyyyying (pun entirely intended!) to get her gone fo' good, son! I don't blame them....can you?!

{Death Cab for Divorce....bad joke, I know}

3. A REAL EMO REASON TO CRY

If you don't love The New Girl or listen to Death Cab for Cutie, just move past this. However, you should know there was another divorce this week that actually did surprise me....the ever-so adorable Zooey Dechanel and DCFC front man Ben Gibbard separated after three years of marriage. I'm no good at math but that's liiiiike......3 years longer than Kim K's....just saying.
You may or may not have heard about this story by the overwhelming sigh of relief and rejoice that came from just about every blue-blooded male on the planet....& me.....because she could do wayyyy better than a dude who sings really sad songs that make me feel like I should have a whole lot of self-pity for no gosh damn reason.

{Gawghus.....Will, you ain't so bad, I 'spose}

4. LONG LIVE THE UNBORN QUEEN

I don't think I ever go a day without seeing a photo of either Kate, Will, Harry, or Pippa on People.com.....a site I visit a solid 3 6 10 times a day. I mean, they have a section completely devoted to the "Royals" which is just bloody brilliant!
I think Pippa is ridiculously gorgeous, I'm waiting for Harry to just get with her already, and if there's a photo of Will, it better have Kate...or I'm just bored.
It's been a year since their engagement (just reached creeper status right there) and I still stinking love Kate. I think it's fantastic they recently made the change to let the future Kate look-a-like daughter to be queen if that day were to come...instead of her potential brother to pass her up for the throne. I think it speaks multitudes for what our future holds and gives me hope I can push my future son off with this royal offspring....you know, a girl can dream!


There you have it, my opinion on the latest celeb juice. You may not be a fan of such news but I am a solid believer in E! being enough news for my knowledge.
Real news is just far too depressing and if I have to hear and/or see another photo of #OccupyWallStreet....I will punch someone.
I will forever be the girl who only reads the "Entertainment" and "Living and Eatocracy" sections on CNN's online site. & no, I am not ashamed to admit this!

Before I leave, please do yourself a favor and type "do a barrel roll" into your google search bar.....and be prepared to feel like you do after 5 too many martinis. You're welcome.

Until next time, where I come back to actually be a sort of beauty blogger, have a splendid and celeb-free day........