Five Friday - Resolutions!

Now that we've moved through Christmas and are SO very close to 2012, I thought I'd do a Five Friday of the resolution variety...you know, those things we all say we will totally do...and before the calendar even reaches the middle of January, we've already failed.

Admit it, we all do this.

Admit it, we all don't really care.

Well, this year, I do. Sort of. Kind of....I mean, I'm going to try!

2012 Resolutions! (Sort of....)

1. Fit into my bridesmaid's dress. No, this is not a strict, LOSE WEIGHT CHUNKER (whooo you callin' chunker?!) resolution, but rather, I need to tone my ass up (or really, my tum tum) before the wedding. It's in May. Calling all Richard Simmons, Jillian Michaels, and Tracey Andersons.....give me your best shot, I'll do my best not to cry in the shower after.

{"she'll never forgive me for skipping those crunches, 

did you hear the way she was screaming at me?!"}

2. ALWAYS eat breakfast. I know, they say a Starbucks latte every morning is not a breakfast meal, but it is to me...or has been for a solid two years now. I eat breakfast on the weekend....sometimes. I need to go out and buy some good "grab and go" breakfast items, so let me hear your healthiest favorites! I can microwave it at work if need be, too, so what is your favorite quick meal?

{starbucks still has to be a part of my "balanced" breakfast....}

3. Keep my car clear of h2o bottles. Yeah, it sounds like a pathetic resolution, but you have probably not seen the passenger floor of my car, it's a disaster zone with half-filled bottles....and lots of them. Seeing as how I have myself a NEW CAR (said in my best Price is Right voice), I think I should kill it with the white trash bottle look and keep my new whip looking fly & fresh.

{i want to say i feel like a straight ganstahh in it, but it's more girly than 

anything - lighted speakers & hands-free controls, though, baboom! 

oh & my keys will never be bulkier that that, hate that look!}

4. Drink TWO bottles of h2o everyday. Hahahahaha I laugh at my audacity to state such a bold thing. Again, another sorry excuse for a resolution, but I am a terrible water drinker. I just don't like the stuff! However, I know it's absurd of me to not drink it, so I plan on making it taste good at least....you know, get rid of that, ugh, water taste. It's awful, really. However, if I can pull off this resolution, then maybe #3 won't be so hard to overcome, too! Genius, I tell you!

{should I just add these to my water, are they any good?!}

5. Actually keep my above resolutions. Hey, go with me on this one. If I follow this resolution, then I just followed every other resolution on my list. It's double the guilt if I make this resolution and don't follow through with the others, sooooo hopefully this one results in my (sort of) resolutions becoming a (definite) reality. Right? RIGHT?! Well, we'll see......

{classic.}

There you have it, my Five Friday -- resolution style! I hope you all realize these are not truly my big goals of 2012, but a list of things that are absurd and easily fixable and prove how ridiculous I am. Hope you have a list of these too ;)

For now, I cheers to you and yours and hope you have the best of times in 2012. I will be back "next year" to discuss my adventures in 2011 and share some photos, too!


Until next time, have fun watching that big ball drop (that came out terribly wrong)...........................

These Shoes were Made for Walking....on NYE!

I have seen so many shoes that would be perfect twinkle toe options for the upcoming festivities of ringing in the new year, so I thought I'd share my favorite ones with you today to get you into the spirit of walking into 2012 with serious style!

GLITTER HEELS. Duh, most obvious choice ever to grace our feet! They pair with just about any outfit so long as it is in solid tones and minimal on the shine and sparkle....we don't want to look like a complete disco ball....at least that's not the look I'm going for!

PAIR WITH:

-a great LBD

-a red skirt and black top

-solid gold dress

-jeans/jewel tone blazer

BRIGHT PLATFORMS. Considering you cannot pair your glitter heels with a glitter dress (unless you want to look like you've been dipped in a vat of sparkles), you'll need to pick another pair of shoes. I have heard that platforms are slowly falling out of style (noooooooo!) but before the new year hits, bring out your red or blue heels to pair with a solid dress to give a great pop of color. Any jewel tone works during the holiday season, so a cobalt blue or great ruby/burgundy color would be perfect.

PAIR WITH:

-a glitter dress

-black tux pants & white collared shirt with a bow-tie (Kardashian "Khristmas" card?!)

-jeans & a sparkly jacket

LEOPARD WEDGES. So fierce, so ridiculously cool, you'll be the best badass anywhere you choose to party on NYE. I would stray from anything shiny or sparkly when wearing these shoes, though, as the combination should be left with the girls being paid to walk the streets that night!
PAIR WITH:
-lace sleeved LBD
-burgundy top & skinny leatherette pants
-cropped skinny jeans & a muted gold sweater

PATENT BLACK BOOTIES. I am usually not a fan of patent black, as most shoes look cheap in this fashion (unless, of course, they aren't actually cheap). Something about a pair of patent booties looks very androgynous, though, which always wins in my fashion book!
PAIR WITH:
-bright tights & a that LBD (always a go-to!)
-dress shorts (in a fun hue!), black tights, white blouse
-black skinnies, ruby sweater, black jewelry

Regardless of your shoes--or outfit--choices, be sure to have a fun, safe, and extremely enjoyable new year's eve....looking forward to seeing NYE outfit posts!!


Until next time, let's rock out these last few days of 2011.................

Christmas Outfits - The Good & The (really) Bad

I know I have already done an outfit post for some go-to holiday styles, but I thought maybe I'd take a moment to point out some fashion trends that may or may not be a good idea to rock for your festive events.

Yeah, I'm talking about all those people you see at church, holiday parties, or work functions that took the dress code to an entirely new level....a level of utter travesty. Let's point them out verbally and giggle behind our computer screens, shall we?

#1 -- ALWAYS Keep it Classy

Ladies, it is never ok to transform your club cocktail dress into a church-going clothing item. Really, the big man and baby Jesus will not smile down on you for your choice of poor fabric, shiny sequins, and sheer black tights you wore in a sorry attempt to "class" up your Christmas outfit.
Rather, think OPAQUE tights, something that hits closer to the knee than closer to your ass, and when in doubt, do not wear something that looks like it falls under the "club" section on F21's website. Yes, hunny, you know what I am talking about...step away from the one-shouldered animal print!

#2 -- Man(ifest) your Guy Code

Gentlemen, please, under no circumstance, wear a turtleneck to any holiday function. Really, even if you are married or have a girl locked down with a ring, it is still entirely unacceptable to revert yourself back to your childhood days of santa-printed turtlenecks and reindeer sweaters. Am I the only one seeing this horrific flashback to yesteryears?! Seriously, though, you look like you're suffocating yourself over the holiday stress and that is never a good look to sport, dear lads.

Rather, a solid-colored sweater or plaid button-down in neutral tones is a smart choice. Understated is always classy, never cheesy. Plus, if you don't have a girl locked down, then you have every reason to look sharp and not seedy with your Santa neck-contraption!

#3 - (Do NOT) Wear your Cheer on Your Sleeves

Lest we forget about those people who wear entirely too much cheer on their sleeves.....and stomachs and shoulders and legs and.....you get the point. Overdoing it on the trashy sweaters and printed pants may be humorous, but really, it is incredibly embarassing at the end of the day. Aside from being the goofy guy in your office or the funny history teacher all the kiddos love, this look does not work! The worst part is when women age themselves by rocking those 3D sweaters where the presents, snowmen, or Christmas trees are literally popping off the vest/sweater/trash...like, really, you really thought it looked good? Did you fail art as a child, too? Clearly your taste in all things creative fell to the wayside somewhere....I hope Santa finds it and brings it back for you with a tastefully wrapped ribbon to boot!
If you must deck the halls in wearable holiday cheer, do it with colors rather than visual art. Wear a red sweater with a great cream scarf. Rock a cobalt blue tee with a black blazer. Jewel tones say "let's rock in this holiday" in a much more fashion-forward way than the woman who has Christmas lights for buttons on her cardigan.

Have any more tips for our fallen fashion friends? Fill me in!

I will leave you with a photo of me & SSB from a Christmas party we attended this weekend.......and boy, we nailed the theme!
Ugly Christmas party?! More like absolutely-dreadful-to-the-point-of-tears Christmas party!! BOOM.

(Yes, mine lights up & yes, SSB has a stocking near/around 

his southern region....gawwwd, I chose a classy one!)

Until next time, I sure hope you are making conscious Christmas clothing choices this season...........

Wrapped Wednesday

Considering the holidays are really just around the corner (or a straight-shot to the weekend, actually), I thought I'd make my WW a festive one....sort of...
What is something every girl thinks about around this time?
Something that sparkles?!
Something that shines?!
Obviously.
I mean that in the sequin-glitter way, ladies, as I am not looking for any bling-bling this holiday season, reeeeelax! (You can breathe easy, too, SSB!)

The scarf I am highlighting today has a hint of sparkle and shine and still keeps me warm and cozy no matter the season. It's subtle enough to not look like I purchased it from a teeny-bopper store, but bold enough to make a statement no matter the outfit pairing.

Ombre Scarf from Express
I bought this as a birthday present to myself (don't we all do that?!) and have loved it dearly ever since. It literally makes any outfit look that much better. The two-tone effect gives it even more wearability, as well, so this bad boy is a front-runner on the wall of scarves. The others are jealous of its sparkly attitude, it's clearly a diva......

{I know the bottom two don't look like it, but the ends are looped through -- the effect usually looks very polished & not quite as plain as it is portrayed in the above photos, my bad!}

The "T" Tie -- Very simple but gives a very polished effect, too!
1. Wrap the scarf around your neck once (the classic way)
2. Bring both ends up into the loop and pull them through.
3. Adjust as needed!
(Sometimes I tie the loops after or even "twirl" the circular part to give a braided effect.)
....like I said, simple but polished. This has been my recent go-to style!


I am hoping Santa is nice this year and brings me a new scarf or two for the collection. Perhaps my next "WW" will be a new scarf that was a Christmas present....one can only hope ;)


Until next time, hope you're keeping warm and wrapped up this Wednesday.......................

Five Friday - SS Santa Edition

How long has it been since I've done one of these?
Don't answer that.....

....I think I stopped because they just got monotonous, fo reals.
Seeing as how it is dangerously close to Santa's arrival, though, I thought maybe I'd do a mini wish list for my classic "Five Friday" post -- bring it back with some Christmas class, ya dig? ;)

Christmas dies a little when the fat red-suit man is no longer real and when your parents stop asking for a "wish list" (which mine still do, but not nearly to the feverish extent in former childhood years) BUMMER, seriously. This holiday really has sneaked (yeah, not snuck!) up on us this year, so I've had little time to consider my gifting options. Below are five that I would be happy to give or better yet...receive for myself, bitches!

1. Urban Decay's 24/7 Eye Pencil Travel Size Set of 5 in NAKED
Why not receive a gift that goes with the greatest eye palette of all time?! I think having mini neutral liners from UD would be an amazing gift. I would love to try these out, too, as I have never purchased one of the 24/7 pencils before. I know, I hear your hushed gasp of shock! Buttttttt, dear sisters, if you're reading, take note. Please & Thank You!

{I think they come in a great size, too, a serious deal!}

2. Ray-Ban Classic Aviators or Wayfarers
I am terrible with sunglasses, so I'm the classic girl who "doesn't deserve nice things." However, I love these sunnies so much, I would consider taking extra good care of them if someone was extra nice enough to give them to me (cough cough, SSB!) -- I would like the gold aviators or the classic black wayfarer....you know, because I'm clearly a badass.

{Ray-Ban knows their shit, for sure!}

3. Fur Throw Blanket
After seeing one of these bad boys at Marshall's recently (which, bee tee dubs, I've become obsessed with their home section as of late!), I had to have one....but didn't really feel like buying it. They are awesome, though! So many color options; a dark brown one with a plush side in addition to the fur. They also had one, though, that was a wild sandy fur color that was out.of.control, hunny! It would look bananas in my bedroom and I'd do Rachel Zoe so proud....and not only because I just used two of her catchphrases!

{Look, this one already comes with a nice bow for wrapping!}

4. New iPhone Case
I feel like I think about "needing" a new case more often than not. Really, I'd be fine and completely content without a new one....had my recent case not just committed pocket suicide. I pulled it out in a rush and the side (that was super-glued shut) caught my pocket & snapped to an unfixable point. I would consider repurchasing the same one (Andy Warhol's print of an old telephone) but wouldn't mind getting a new one that was a bit girlier. I currently have an EIGHT dollar one from ON (feels like highway robbery) that looks like an old cassette tape....pretty badass, but I could still use another option ;)

{DVF knows her clothes and now she does the iPhone beautiful justice, too!}

5. New MBMJ Watch

I love the one I already have, but I could always use a gold/rose gold option for those accessory days where a silver watch just isn't vibing with the rest of my outfit. Girl problems are so tough! I love simple watches, not into bling-tastic ones, but it needs to be masculine. I hate small watches. Yuck city. I mean, I'd be pretty freaking content with the one below!

{Love the two-tone style, simple but sleek}

This could sound totally bitch-tastic, but that was a fun "Five Friday" to do! Now that I got to write my own Christmas list, I feel much more into the holiday spirit. Granted, my family and friends have most likely finished their shopping already, but I'll be sure to keep these items in mind when I'm out shopping for myself post-Christmas...is that wrong of me? Probably. Do I care? Definitely not.



Until next time, I hope you are also diving whole-heartedly into the holiday season. I will be back to show some weekend pics of SSB and myself in awesome Christmas attire...............

Christmas Crafts with a GUEST BLOGGER

Considering I have very few crafty bones in my body (& the ones I do possess are pathetic, at best), I've asked one of my dear blogging buddies to conjure up some holiday crafts to get everyone thinking of snow, sugar plums (what are these anyways?!), and Santa!

If you've never had the pleasure of checking out her blog, please do so to thank her for giving you such fan-tabulous craft ideas to make sure your holiday is bright ;)

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Hello everyone! I am so excited to be a guest blogger on SS's amazing blog! I am the writer behind Little Ramblings. I love fashion, makeup, music, movies, etc., and you can find all of this and more on my blog! Today, I will be sharing some of my crafty DIY centerpieces to help you prepare for the holidays!   

Cranberries & Pebbles.

This first centerpiece is my favorite. It is simple and so elegant. Another plus about this centerpiece is how affordable it is! I bought the vase and glass pebbles at The Dollar Store, so that's a grand total of two dollars. I picked up the cranberry branches at Jo-Ann Fabrics last year so I am not certain of the price, but I believe they were on sale for about one or two dollars. They can be found at any craft store, too!

{This decorative piece would be a great centerpiece, but it could also be placed 

on a mantle, side table, or even in a bedroom for a sleek and simple decoration.}

Pinecones & Ornaments. 

These two items are not just for the trees. I love the idea of incorporating the outdoors...indoors. There are so many options when it comes to this decoration. You can use a variety of containers (vase, basket, tin box) and mix & match what you put inside of each!

 {I love pinecones and the rustic feel they provide. By adding simple, solid colored ornaments, a chic and simple ensemble is created. My favorite design is the vase with pinecones and ornaments. I love mixing gold and red together. They are the perfect holiday colors for anything and everything. This would look gorgeous on a table with a couple candles surrounding it. Very romantic! You could also place these decorations on a bookshelf, side table, or any nook and cranny that could use a little holiday cheer!}

Bright & Beautiful.

I love the bright and cheerful colors of this decoration. It might be the simplest project because you probably already have what you will need lying around your house already. All you need is a giant bowl and ornaments of your choice!

{The colors and designs on the ornaments remind me of something Cindy Lou Who would put together in The Grinch. The giant glass bowl makes just as much of a statement as the bright baubles. I picked up these beautiful ornaments at The Dollar store, as well! That place has some great stuff if you spend some time looking. I picture this piece in the middle of a table filled with snacks and treats to add a little extra glam. It would also make for a fun centerpiece!}

I hope you enjoyed this little DIY post! I would love to see your versions of these centerpiece ideas! I hope you have a great holiday season! Thanks again for having me SS!

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Thank YOU so very merry much, Little Ramblings, for spreading holiday cheer on my blog today. I love these ideas and will do my darn best to incorporate them into my Christmas decor! My personal favorite decor item this season (aside from presents under the tree!) is a Christmas tree candle! I absolutely love the scent of a fresh tree and am glad candle companies jar that shit up so I can have it before our actual tree is cut down and put into our home! (Which is happening later today, woot!)

Until next time, check out my blogging buddy's page and have a very merry time utilizing your Christmas crafts...........

I'm a Prisoner of High School WAR!

....not really, but that's what it feels like! After all, when was the last time I blogged? I don't even remember. Gawwwd, that is a travesty worse than my kiddos failing their philosophy quiz today. HAPPY FRIDAY TO MEEEEE!

What's that, SS? You're discussing your job? That can only mean one thing.....

TEACHER RAAANTS!

hell to the yes.

{no, I do not drink on my job, smoke the reefer, or teach middle school anymore....

but this photo is still kind of perfect.}

I should really preface, well, my entire life by saying I truly am a happy human being. I laugh at the absurdity this job sometimes always shows me, enjoy it to the fullest (most days), and do not walk around all schlumpty-dumpty because I have students who hate me (or other teachers, get over it, you're 40).
I, in fact, work my tush off and then go home to my other life. My life that keeps me sane. My life of napping, eating dinner with friends, drinking with the bf, and other wonderful weekend activities. Those don't (always) make for good stories, though!
Teacher rants, though? Ohhh ho-ho, hunny, they will forever be jems.....these ones happen to all be of the "let's awkwardly hit on the young teacher" variety. ENJOY!

Lesson 1: LISTEN carefully....
Me: Sometimes, this class would be a heck of a lot easier if you were all just as calm as me!
Male Student: Wait, wait, so you don't want me to do me, you want me to do you?
Me: For the 42 minutes you're in my class, yes, I think that's just enough time to learn how relaxing it is.
Male Student: Miss Smith, I'll wait.....{solid five second pause}
Me: Ugh, I hate my life. Well played, though. I hate you, but well played.
.......If you didn't get it right away, either, I don't feel as bad. If you go back and read my response, it fits almost too well. Face, meet my palm. Face, meet my hard desk....and meet is again and again.

Lesson 2: Smell the Sexy
Student: Miss Smith, do you ever have to use the girls' bathroom?
Me: I have before, yes, but do my best to avoid it.
Student: Do you ever smell the upsexy in there?!
Me: I'm sorry, what?
Student: The upsexy, in the girls' bathroom, have you smelled it before?
Me: Seriously, are you slurring your words? Did you take too much cold medicine again?
Student: The upsexy Miss Smith!
Me: What the heck is upsexy?!
Student: Not much, Miss Smith, and thank you for calling me sexy. That's going on Facebook.
......I would have thought he was so damn clever if it was not for the fact I saw this on other blogs just a week after it happened. I tried it on SSB afterwards....didn't work very well. Damnit.

Lesson 3: Cue the Lonely Island Song.....
(Student walking into my class listening to his iPod, song "On Fire")
Student #1: Miss Smith, we're both on fire, what with our red hair.
Me: Yeah, if only mine were real, but it's not.
Student #2: Wait, that isn't your natural hair color?
Me: No, I'm a natural blonde actually, going back to it in March.
Student #2: I think I just, uh, in my pants, I can't wait for March.
Student #1: Well, I guess we'll both still be on fire then, right Miss Smith? Get it? Get it?
........I think SSB may need to come into my classroom(s) with a baseball bat on the last day to beat some sense and respect into these kiddos!

If you're wondering what satisfaction I get out of my job, sometimes I ask myself that question. Really, though, even if I am driven to drink after each day I leave the building, I still love what I do. Even when the kiddos fail their quizzes because they didn't study or a kid comes into my class 5 minutes late because he was "dropping off his kids at the pool," I still love my job. All you can do is smile, laugh, and play harder than you work. I do just that.

I'll leave you with the best comment I heard being yelled down the hallway just before my favorite eighth period today (which is where all of the above stories come from!)...."WELL, HAVE FUN SEXING UP SKANY [insert girl name here] TONIGHT, BECAUSE YOU SURE AS HELL AREN'T GETTING ME!"
.......and the bulk of this school is filled with rich, white kids. Yeah. I felt like I was in a 2011 mashup of Clueless and Mean Girls.....& I loved it.


Glad I could come back from my hectic job to blog about...my hectic job. More rants coming soon, I'm sure, but hopefully they are entirely unrelated to barely legal kiddos faililng miserably in the pick-up lines department.

Until next time, farewell friends and lovahs.........

November Favorites

Yes, I'm still alive! I know it's only been a week but dear gawwwd it's felt like ages since I've checked up on everyone's blogs (and my own!) and this is one of the things in my life that keeps me sane, so you can only imagine how crazed I am! This past week was out of control and it is great to take this time to catch my breath and blog a bit!

Now that December is here, I thought I'd share some monthly favorites!

1. "Dirty" Chai Tea Latte - Take a chai tea latte, add vanilla & a shot of espresso (or two), and you just made one dirty but delicious drink! It's the perfect blend, trust me on this one, I'm an sbux whore after all (or just a whore dating a barista, whichever....)
**Perhaps I should do a new 'bux drink every month seeing as how I did a drink last month!**

2. New Ink - Obviously a favorite considering I got them in the beginning of this month. I am so in love with my new roman numerals and feather. Plus, they gave me another reason to buy new tops for work to cover them, even though I don't really have to, considering my tats are not naked women or swear words.

3. Dermalogica's Daily Mircofoliant - My skin was all sorts of "blah" this month -- sometimes dry, sometimes oily, sometimes downright miserable. This kept my skin from going full-blown hideous on me, thank the good skincare lords.

4. Florence + The Machine's Ceremonials - SUCH a fantastic album, it was on my iPod non-stop....and a group of students may or may not (read may) have caught me belting out to it on the way to school one morning. "So you like to sing in the car Miss Smith? That's hot." -- Good thing I have no shame.

5. Colorful Beanie - A favorite towards the end of the month, yes, but damnit I love this hat already, I wore it as often as I could! I was tempted to say "yes, of course!" to those few who have asked me if I made it myself, but let's be real, SS has no real talents like that. Only $5 from F21, though, so at least I have the talent of noticing a good bargain! (sorry for the blurry photo of it)

6. Covergirl Eyebrow Pencil in Soft Brown - My eyebrows are practically invisible against my face, thanks natural blonde hair. This one matches perfectly to my new darker hue, to the point where people who know about my blonde brows will say, "Genius idea to color your brows to match." Yeah, I would never actually color my brows, that seems too dangerous to me (says the girl who has gone to get her lashes tinted......but hey, those bad boys are invisible, too!)

There you have it, my favorite products/items/whatevers for the eleventh month of the year. Let's hope the last month of 2011 is a fantastically beautiful one! Here's to 20-ish days until Santa comes......SANTA?! I KNOW HIM!!! (couldn't resist!)

Until next time, I look forward to reading about your favorites for this month!.........