Yeah, I'm talking about all those people you see at church, holiday parties, or work functions that took the dress code to an entirely new level....a level of utter travesty. Let's point them out verbally and giggle behind our computer screens, shall we?
#1 -- ALWAYS Keep it Classy
Rather, think OPAQUE tights, something that hits closer to the knee than closer to your ass, and when in doubt, do not wear something that looks like it falls under the "club" section on F21's website. Yes, hunny, you know what I am talking about...step away from the one-shouldered animal print!
#2 -- Man(ifest) your Guy Code
Gentlemen, please, under no circumstance, wear a turtleneck to any holiday function. Really, even if you are married or have a girl locked down with a ring, it is still entirely unacceptable to revert yourself back to your childhood days of santa-printed turtlenecks and reindeer sweaters. Am I the only one seeing this horrific flashback to yesteryears?! Seriously, though, you look like you're suffocating yourself over the holiday stress and that is never a good look to sport, dear lads.
Rather, a solid-colored sweater or plaid button-down in neutral tones is a smart choice. Understated is always classy, never cheesy. Plus, if you don't have a girl locked down, then you have every reason to look sharp and not seedy with your Santa neck-contraption!
#3 - (Do NOT) Wear your Cheer on Your Sleeves
Lest we forget about those people who wear entirely too much cheer on their sleeves.....and stomachs and shoulders and legs and.....you get the point. Overdoing it on the trashy sweaters and printed pants may be humorous, but really, it is incredibly embarassing at the end of the day. Aside from being the goofy guy in your office or the funny history teacher all the kiddos love, this look does not work! The worst part is when women age themselves by rocking those 3D sweaters where the presents, snowmen, or Christmas trees are literally popping off the vest/sweater/trash...like, really, you really thought it looked good? Did you fail art as a child, too? Clearly your taste in all things creative fell to the wayside somewhere....I hope Santa finds it and brings it back for you with a tastefully wrapped ribbon to boot!If you must deck the halls in wearable holiday cheer, do it with colors rather than visual art. Wear a red sweater with a great cream scarf. Rock a cobalt blue tee with a black blazer. Jewel tones say "let's rock in this holiday" in a much more fashion-forward way than the woman who has Christmas lights for buttons on her cardigan.
Have any more tips for our fallen fashion friends? Fill me in!
I will leave you with a photo of me & SSB from a Christmas party we attended this weekend.......and boy, we nailed the theme!
Ugly Christmas party?! More like absolutely-dreadful-to-the-point-of-tears Christmas party!! BOOM.
(Yes, mine lights up & yes, SSB has a stocking near/around
his southern region....gawwwd, I chose a classy one!)
Until next time, I sure hope you are making conscious Christmas clothing choices this season...........
I was about to ask if yours had lights and then I saw your comment that it did! How awesome! where did you find such a thing?!
ReplyDeleteHAA I'm literally laughing out loud! Everyone loves a good ugly xmas sweater but theyre only meant to be worn at ugly sweater parties!!
ReplyDeletexo Jackie
...livingaftermidnite
LOL I LOVE the cat guy! Check this out =P http://www.buzzfeed.com/hgrant/26-of-the-best-of-the-worst-family-holiday-cards
ReplyDeleteUgly sweater Xmas themes are amazing! Happy holidays to you & yours!
ReplyDeleteI love your outfit for the party! So great! Ugly Christmas Sweater parties are one of my favorite holiday events!
ReplyDeleteHilarious! I never cease to be amazed by the crap people pull out of their closets during the holidays. A woman at my parents' Christmas party was wearing a t-shirt with a picture of a frog holding mistletoe and the phrase "MistleTOAD." ... and she totally wasn't wearing it in an ironic way.
ReplyDelete